“How we respond when we think we’ve been sinned against can reveal self-righteousness,” writes Dave Harvey.  He defines self-righteousness as “a sense of moral superiority that appoints us as prosecutor of other people’s sinfulness.  We relate to others as if we are incapable of the sins they commit.”  Mr. Harvey is talking about the importance of being merciful in the context of marriage and how our own self-righteousness undermines our ability to be merciful to our spouse.  He gives a few questions for believers to ask themselves to see if they are suffering from self-righteousness when encountering a conflict.  Again, the context is marriage, but the principles transcend into all relationships, from you best friend Roberto to that weird guy Sven you met at that one party who has a weird laugh and collects novelty coffee mugs.  Shoot, to all the people in your life that you’re just down-right better than.  So to gauge your sense of self-righteousness in the context of all interpersonal relationships in your life, ask yourself the following:

• Am I self-confident that I see the supposed “facts” clearly?
• Am I quick to assign motives when I feel I’ve been wronged?
• Do I find it easy to build a case against someone that makes me seem right and him or her seem wrong?
• Do I ask questions with built-in assumptions I believe will be proven right?  Or do I ask impartial questions- the kind that genuinely seek new information regardless of its implications for my preferred outcome?
• Am I overly concerned about who is to blame for something?
• Am I able to dismiss questions like these as irrelevant?

(Questions from Dave Harvey, When Sinners Say “I Do”- Discovering the Power of the Gospel for Marriage)

“…[Love] keeps no record of being wronged.”
1 Corinthians 13:5 (NLT)

“…in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them.”
2 Corinthians 5:19 (ESV)